Remnants of Tropical Storm Alberto Detained by ICE

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

(AP)Late Tuesday night, federal agents detained the remnants of Tropical Storm Alberto on suspected violations of Immigration laws in a joint operation between agents of ICE– Immigration and Customs Enforcement– and the US Secret Service.

Officials said they were acting on a “credible threat relayed to ICE by the NSA that was the result of domestic monitoring of NOAA (National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration) communications.”

Alberto was tracked to North Carolina, where, according to officials, he was “blending in with the legitimate American weather.”

This is believed to be the first instance of the government detaining a weather system on alleged Immigration charges.

Calls to the ICE were not immediately returned, and a telephone outage prevented comment from the NSA.

I hate UPS

I hate UPS.

Yeah, that’s right, I said it. Now you can go ahead with your comments, telling me I’m an idiot, disagreeing with everything I say, or telling me why UPS is great. Fine by me—opinion is opinion is opinion. Here’s my current frustration.

UPS has been running these radio advertisements bragging about their speedy delivery for quite some time now. This one in particular runs several times during every Braves game, which I listen to on occasion when the only other options is either of the annoying ‘Michael’s—Regan or Savage.

The advertisement talks about how baseball, as a game, is slow. It actually pokes fun—poorly—at baseball fans, who seem to be the target audience for this advertisement. Instead of saying something about how baseball fans know what they want—long games and fast shipping—the commercial instead paints baseball fans as idiots willing to endure the torture of 9 innings.

So, in their effort to explain how fast UPS is, it seems that UPS has in fact forgotten that actions speak louder than words.

On Monday, a week ago today, a package destined for my front door was given to UPS in California. As of today, 5 business days later—7 days total—it is yet to arrive.

See, normally this isn’t a big deal. But in this case, my package was actually scheduled to be delivered last Friday, and was delayed by a “late train.” So, it was delayed by a day. Fine. I don’t mind having my package being delayed a day. But in this case, it is a big inconvenience since that one day happens to be a weekend—one where I had intended to use the items I am having delivered.

So here is where I have a beef with UPS. My package was to be delivered on Friday. It was not. It is currently after 2:30PM, and it is still not here.

If UPS really wanted to prove how fast their speed, it would be in their best interest to ensure that packages that are delayed at the fault of UPS are placed up for delivery first. Once a package is late, its tracking number should be updated to reflect a new service level—Next Day by 8AM—to ensure it is delivered to the customer at the earliest possible moment. It should be rerouted to the early truck, and delivered as soon as possible.

Otherwise, I view this as a mistake, followed by an intentional delay in delivery. Shipping companies who intentionally delay my packages do not earn my business in the future.

But then again, that is why I much prefer FedEx, which offers a much faster ground service, has a much more timely tracking system, and lower rates in most cases.

You’re damn right I want to race the truck, and I’d like to put a lot of money on the line. I’d be done and gone before UPS even showed up.