Tennis, the next Soccer

I’ll tell you right now, tennis is the next soccer.

No, I’m not talking about the advent of a new class of wide-bottomed prozac-in-solution tennis moms. I’m not saying that the rules of tennis will be altered to ridiculously disallow the use of the most dextrous part of the body. Nor am I implying that the tennis gods will come up with a way to incread the number of tied matches after somehow figuring out a way to remove the likelihood that either players actually score.

What I mean is that tennis, much like the world cup of several months ago, is going to be crammed down our throats via constant unearned media coverage.

The attempt will be made to somehow make every non-tennis fan feel inadequate for not paying attention to the adults playing kids games for inappropriately-large sums of money. And for some, it will work.

Not me, though. I see tennis for what it is: a sport I do not wish to watch.

First soccer. Now tennis. Up next, either cricket or rugby. Or maybe some hurling. Hurling is good.


7 thoughts on “Tennis, the next Soccer

  1. Yes, so please tell us, oh wise one, which sports are acceptable?

  2. Hurling?

    The only sports that are good to watch are basketball and football. Baseball is an event and is fine as long as the stakes are high (i.e. the playoffs and your team is involved).

    Ping pong should be the next big sport. Heck, there’s even a video game of ping pong (i.e. table tennis)

    Sports are fun to play, but most are boring to watch.

  3. Yes, hurling:

    I really enjoy watching football. And like you said, high-stakes or emotionally-tied baseball is good too (although I enjoy actually *going* to a game regardless of the stakes/team).

    But basketball? Basketball?! It’s non-existant down here, and that’s a good thing to me. I couldn’t tell you the last time I was flipping through the channels and saw a basketball game on anything but the dedicated sports channels.

    Living in the Chicago suburbs when the Bulls ran the show in the NBA turned me off to basketball altogether, and the behaviour of the players hasn’t done much to reverse that.

    Thanks for stopping by, AM!


  4. Man, I’ve fallen behind here… I grew up loving Tennis and it has been very popular in the past. There haven’t been many great American players recently so it hasn’t been covered as much. I would say Tennis coverage has decreased over the past 15 years as opposed to increasing.

    As for soccer, I’m a fanatic. Not because of a media conspiracy shoved down my throat, I watched it and fell in love with the game. More and more soccer fans = more coverage. If you want to blame someone, you should probably blame people like me. haha

  5. Keep up man!

    I don’t mind if they put sports on tv… really any sport is fair game to me.

    Just don’t call it news. It’s entertainment, and entertainment should not be considered news. I don’t care if Tom Cruise is eating placenta or if an athlete is doing funny dances on the field. Don’t put it in my news and we’re in good shape.

    Now once entertainment becomes crimimal, it might be news. But athletes are just bodies, their opinion is not more valuable than anyone else’s, and the outcome of today’s game has very little impact on the rest of my life.


  6. I certainly agree with your statement here. How many times do I need to see Terrell Owens? I keep waiting for him to be named Time Person of the Year.

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