10/15/2006

Why CNN will ultimately fail

Filed under: — Mike @ 10:22 pm

11:18PM. Sunday, October 15, 2006.

Earthquakes hit Hawaii earlier in the day.

I check out CNN Headline News for updated coverage. Nope, two women talking about whether or not Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney should be friends.

I flip to regular CNN. Shoot to Kill. It’s a story about overzealous cops.

At least I think it was. I flipped channels, looking for… brace yourselves…

NEWS!

Repeat after me:

CNN stands for Cable NEWS Network.

CNN stands for Cable NEWS Network.

CNN stands for Cable NEWS Network.

CNN stands for Cable NEWS Network.

And this is why CNN will ultimately fail. They forgot that they’re supposed to cover the news.

Mike

6 Responses to “Why CNN will ultimately fail”

  1. Boyd says:
    10/16/2006 at 2:02 am

    You’d think so, but then look at what Fox News airs from 6 to 10 each night.

  2. Mike says:
    10/16/2006 at 2:17 am

    I *know*! But come on, if you don’t know that you’re getting massive amounts of opinion mixed with whatever is considered “entertainment,” you *deserve* to believe every word that Fox says.

    Regular CNN, fine. Show all the crap they want. They can be CNN’s answer to Fox.

    But Headline News? I expect… umm… Headlines!

    I know we disagree on most everything, but can we agree that a discussion between a post-plastic surgery guest and a pre-plastic surgery host regarding personal relationships between a has-been pop star and a has-been rock-and-roll star is *not* qualified as Headline News, particularly when there are actual headlines to be covered?

  3. Eeyore says:
    10/16/2006 at 4:23 am

    Then I guess MTV and VH1 are doomed to fail to. Rumor has it that those channels used to play music videos. It will get worse not better. Look soon for CNN to play movies about news related events.

  4. Mike says:
    10/16/2006 at 7:33 am

    Heh… I would have no idea, Eeyore.

    The last time I tuned into VH1 they were airing Standup Spotlight, and the last time I tuned into MTV… uhh… I couldn’t tell you.

    But everyone expects news on CNN.

  5. Jaime says:
    10/16/2006 at 4:55 pm

    Let’s not forget that this is the same CNN that just last week couldn’t figure out the basic definition of ‘breaking news.’ This is in reference to the Corey Lidle plane crash. It happened at around 2:40pm. At around 8pm, they were still covering it with a huge ‘BREAKING NEWS’ image across the screen. Nothing takes 5.5 hours to ‘break.’ Maybe time for a focus group or two, CNN.

  6. Mike says:
    10/16/2006 at 5:24 pm

    Eh, why bother with the focus group? Headline News’ own Chicken Little Glenn Beck says we’re all gonna die anyway.

    I’m just going to sit here and wait for it.

    Mike

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